The Coaching Process
Whether it’s a career pivot, launching a business, "adulting", parenting, finding a partner, or improving your relationships, I can help you make change happen.
I've been a career and life coach for the last 18 years, during which time I've coached thousands of clients toward successful mindset and life change. Based on what works for clients, I have developed a life coaching process that helps change happen more efficiently.
When you hire me, we work together for a few months or a few years. During that time we set and achieve goals, but more importantly I foster your relationship with yourself and what can be possibly. We meet regularly (either weekly or fortnightly) to make change happen. I ask difficult questions, we take your insight to new levels and next steps are revealed. Instead of struggling to take action, you're moving forward with speed. After a couple of sessions, you’ll realize that you’ve made more progress in one month than you thought possible.
My clients have an itch to scratch – something they want to do that’s ambitious, a little scary...something that won't let go of them. They partner with me because they know I'll help them make that meaningful contribution to the world.
Someone is going to cure cancer, write a book, and advocate for social change. Why can’t it be you? Let’s turn that question around. How can it be you? That's the question I help clients answer (and execute).
In Step One we identify what matters to you, clarify your values, redefine success and actively IMAGINE (and reimagine) your goals.
We have a conversation about what you like — what you’ve always liked, what you’re drawn to. We reconnect with the enthusiasms of your 8 year old self, and draw the dotted line to today and tomorrow. Together, we build a visual picture of your future — what it will look like when you’re living in a way that has meaning for you.
Everyone has an idea of what success is. Maybe your perspective is shaped by your parents, the media, or your friends and neighbors. We ll talk about what a successful life will look like two years from now and 10 years from now and six months from now.
Perhaps success in your 20s was working crazy hours as a journalist, following every story. But maybe success in your 40s is about working smarter, making good money (and we define what that is), and coaching your daughter’s flag football team.
As you move forward, actively pursuing your next steps, we keep your future vision in mind. As you take your next steps, we continue to return to your values, ensuring that your actions are in sync with the person you are. This enhances your flow.
Now that we’ve identified your core values, your superpower and your definition of success, we can make a PLAN.
First, let’s paint pictures. That book you want to write: what does the cover look like? What will you do with your spouse (when you find him or her) for your 5th wedding anniversary? Tell me about your summer vacation with the kids when they are nine years old. These are powerful tools, these pictures, because when you start to visualize, you can actualize. These visions prepare your brain to expect this reality. These are your big, powerful milestones.
During the planning phase, I observe the gap between what you say you want and what you’re doing to achieve what you want. And then, gently and carefully, we close that gap. You want to lose weight but you don’t want to give up your nightly wine and cheese habit. Can you substitute something else for the wine and cheese this week? No? Ok, you OK to keep those pounds for the winter and then shed the pounds in the summer? Sounds good to me. Let’s just be honest and get those nagging “wants” and “shoulds” to go away. Make room for the “wills” and “cans”.
I support you and believe in the pictures you draw. I stay by your side through the process. You said that you were going to write for 90 minutes every morning? Wonderful. How is it going. You need check ins from me daily? You'll have them until the habit is set. I provide regular accountability until that habit is established, and then we begin working on a different habit. After a few months, that screenplay will be ready for the next step.
This process helps us move from what I call “inch pebbles”, like writing every day, to completing milestones, i.e. a completed manuscript.
Until you do that thing you want to do – whether it’s writing your book or setting up a new business practice, it’s just talk. Like a first kiss, or giving birth, you can talk all you want but until you do it you don’t really know what the experience is like.
I move you to action while the plan isn't fully fleshed out yet. You will learn more while taking action.
I have a client who wanted to catapult her career. She was working in real estate investment, and she was making a lot of money. She was skilled, capable, and frustrated.
Her reviews were flawless, and yet — she couldn’t seem to get the company to support a significant promotion. We strategized. She had meetings with senior management, mentors, and over the course of months of trying, one thing became clear: she was hitting a glass ceiling and significant gender bias. And it wasn’t going away, at least not in this firm.
Then we dug deep: she didn’t want another job in real estate; she didn’t want to work for a competitor. As a kid, she loved starting businesses: she wanted to try starting — and running — her own company. She wanted to be an entrepreneur. Should she go to business school? What was the next step?
After thinking, acting, and trying new things, she decided to go for it. She and her boyfriend (now husband), started a company. Within a year, Facebook offered to buy them out. Today she’s onto her third tech startup, and she’s the CEO.
Here’s what I love about how the coaching process works: She wanted to move up in the company, yet she was blocked (through no fault of her own). So we dug deeper, to get at what would be even more meaningful for her. In the end, she ended up in a far more satisfying and authentic place. Oh, and our secondary goal of finding the right partner and starting a family? That took care of itself when she became more authentically herself.
Implement, refine. Implement, refine. This is the engine of change, and where we spend most of our time together. You’ve established a vision, made a plan, now we iterate through old-fashioned trial and error until we get to that place where you say, “Yes! This is me!”
While we work together, you lose sight of how hard you’re working, because you get into the flow state.
We work as a team – the coaching process and the coach are your rocket boosters and you're the spaceship, ready to launch. You need us to clear atmosphere, and then you're flying high, living a life of your design.
As you accomplish, we take time to celebrate and acknowledge each achievement. When we do this, we look back at what is working and why.
By reinforcing what works, we’re encouraging those habits for the future. Celebrating is actually part of the work! Really, take a look at the (R)evolution Coaching Process graphic again -- celebrating is part of the process.
Coaching Intro Session
Why does coaching work?
We remove the blocks so you can visualize your future. When you see it, you can create it.
Just like envisioning the perfect golf swing, start imagining that great future place. That happy marriage, that home of your dreams. You want an office where you see clients? A multi-million dollar company? Envision that office. Envision your customer. Let's do this.
Then, you'll start doing the blocking and tackling to make it happen. We strategize, implement, reassess, move forward. You're trying the idea on.
And then at some point, as the pieces fall into place that vision becomes so enticing, the work starts to take care of yourself. Instead of pushing a boulder up hill, you've caught the wind, and it's pulling you in the direction you want to go.
Let's do this.
I am an accountability partner. We work together in deep parnership from start to finish.
Sure, you write that book on your own. You could start a company on your own. But it’s more fun, fast and effective, to have a partner who shares your vision and nurtures your baby along with you.
And when the "shoulds" and "can'ts" show up, I'll help you quiet the critic, return to your values and in time turn the critic into an ally and protector of your idea.
No matter how many times a midwife delivers a baby, it always seems like a miracle. No matter how much faith I have in my clients, I’m consistently blown away by how you bring forth a more magnificent reality than we had conceived.
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